As I was approaching the start of my summer as a MAIP Fellow and as a Copywriting Intern at McCann, I was (if I'm being completely honest) feeling the weight of what most people know as imposter syndrome.
That feeling of "why me?", "how did I get here?", and "when will they realize I was chosen by mistake?" It got to the point where I started dreaming that I'd get a call saying that the committee and McCann had selected me by accident. No really, I had that exact dream. I'm sure this may seem dramatic to some, but I promise I have a point here.
I - and I don't think I'm the only one that's experienced this - tend to feel this way when I know big things are coming. Things that I've wanted for a while. Because in this one summer, I was getting to experience so many firsts and so many things that I just never imagined I'd get to experience (not at this age at least). In front of me, I had the opportunity to be a MAIP Fellow - a group I didn't expect to find myself in. I had the opportunity of my first ever advertising internship, and at a major agency no less. And, even better, I had the chance to work in New York city (virtually of course, but still exciting).
As a little girl, I'd always dreamed of living a life full of creativity and impact in the Big Apple. The first time I visited, I was so inspired by the lights, the pace, the people. It just blew me away, and from then on, I wanted a piece of it.
While this opportunity isn't a guaranteed ticket to living out my Big Apple dream, it is a giant step closer. A step that might not have been possible if it weren't for MAIP.
I think that's why so many people apply to this program every year. It gives the little kid inside us all a real fighting chance at our dreams. It helps us push down those doubts and those harmful feelings, and makes us realize that we're here and that we have the potential to make things happen for ourselves.
Throughout my internship so far, I've been able to overcome those negative thoughts little by little. With every question I ask, every piece of feedback I receive, and every new co-worker I have the chance to meet, I feel a sense of gratitude for that initial fear. I don't let it cripple me, but rather I hold on to it as a memory and a reminder to keep going, because I'm onto something big.